It takes a lot of courage in releasing the familiar and seemingly secure,
to embrace the new.  But there is no security in what is no longer meaningful.  There is more security in the adventurous and exciting…

In movement, there is life… 

In change, power.

I read these words from a friend’s status on IM, and it has somehow given me some sense on why I am undergoing these current struggles.  Change can be painful and difficult.  But one can always hope for a better day in the end.

I just hope that the silver lining is not far off.

I am at a point in my life where a lot of things are changing, and a lot of things are new and at its fragile state.  Such as being in a new firm and reconnecting with lost friends.  But I did not expect that there would be backlash for the latter.  Somehow this reminded me why I disconnected from them in the first place.

You can never contol other people.  You can never truly control how you will be treated by your friends.  You can be kind to them, understanding and be there for them, with the hope that they will reciprocate it with their presence when you need them.  But that’s all you can do really… hope.

I have always had the bad habit of expecting friends to treat me in the same way that I treat them.  Somewhere along the way, a friend had taught me not to do that.  Somewhere along the way, I did break that habit.  But as I rekindle those severed ties, I find myself going back to that bad practice.Â

It is not healthy because people can easily let you down, and it will just frustrate you to no end.

My reflex is to protect my heart from future hurt.  I choose to save myself from all that right now, and reconsider some of the people with whom I would want to continue my journey with.

Spending your first week in a new workplace is always filled with anxiety.  I am just thankful that my team accepted me with open arms.

Over the next weeks I will have to prove my worth to the firm.  I understand that they have high expectations of me.  Somehow, even after all this time, I am astonished when people look up to me that way.

I will have to face the coming challenges with dedication and an unwavering confidence in my abilities.

It has barely been a week after the storm Milenyo.  Everything just got back to normal a couple of days ago, with the power, water, phone and internet.  While waiting in the dark for days on end, I appreciated the time that the storm created for us.  My brother and sister had much opportunity to talk and laugh, something that only happened at breakfast, and sometimes at dinner, on other days.

Now that the storm outside has passed, I have dedicated myself to resolving the storms brewing within the house.  For the passed months, after discovering the root of the rift I had with my siblings, my trust with a housemate whom my mother relied on for fifteen years has wavered.  After all, she is the root of those conflicts.  To add to this, certain things have been brought to my attention, and things that I have noticed myself, that support this growing mistrust.

With great resolve, I decided to talk to this person, a conversation that has led to her denial and ultimately a war of words.  But this is my domain, I am responsible for the people who live here.  I am, first and foremost, responsible for my family.  I have always been one to have unwavering anger and resolve.  So as I make a stand now, I know that I will not falter.

I gave them time to digest what I have told them.  But I think they have too much pride in their hearts to admit their mistakes.  If I ever had a morsel of regret to what I have told them, it has dissipated.

As I step out of the office for the last time, I cannot help but remember the years that I have spent with the firm.  These years have been long and hard, most of the time.  But I must admit that I have enjoyed the ride.

To the friends and colleagues I have worked with there, I left them this message:

Today is my last day here in the firm. I would just like to thank each and every one of you for being a part of my Accenture experience!

The world of IT in the Philippines is a never-ending cycle of people moving from one place to another, so for most of you, I am quite confident that this will not be the last time that our paths shall cross. I have truly appreciated everyone, for I know that in one or more aspects, I have learned something from every person I have worked with in my stay here.

I wish you guys all the best in your endeavors. Keep in touch!

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Now I face a new road ahead of me.  Wish me luck guys!